P has a problem at school and I don't even know where to beginning to tell you about it. I don't want to vent too much on Canadian Coupon Mom. It is suppose to be fun and free but there has been an on going problem with my son since just before March break.
My son has had this friend from down the street who is also in his kindergarten class. Now when they first met they hit it off and had a ton of fun playing together. I will admit P is very sensitive and he has been told right from wrong in our eyes from the moment he was born. This may have been a bad way of parenting on our part, I don't know.
P loves school, just loves it and wants to go everyday even on the weekends. At the beginning of the school year he had lots of friends both boys and girls and loved to come home and talk about them. Since this has happened there have been days P has said he doesn't want to go to school, or that he doesn't have school anymore.
One day P came and told me "I'm not friends with B (lets call him this), he is bold and mean to me".
I replied with "P why are you not friends? how has he been mean?"
P: "He calls me Baby P Baby P and he also plays shooting games when I told him I don't want to play" This was told to me in such a way that I just wanted to cry. The hurt that came from Baby P was unreal.
Me: "P can you talk to him, I am sure he doesn't mean this. Is anyone else mean to you?"
P: "Yes, (P named off about 4 more boys, there are about 9 or 10 in his class) in my class, I only play with girls. S asked me why I was crying when B was mean."
This is a conversation I had with a four year old. I will admit he can be over the top sensitive but he is very sharp for a four year old. This breaks my heart that this is happening already in JK. I did figure he would get teased and likely bullied but not until grade 2 or more. He down right refuses to play with this child as P reminds me he is mean and bold and he doesn't like that.
Bullying is defined as so many things here is one definition I have found online.
"A person is being bullied when he or she is exposed, repeatedly and over time,
to negative actions on the part of one or more other persons and he or she has difficulty defending himself or herself..” —— Dan Olweus
I attended an Anti-Harassment training at work last week and bullying was a huge part of the training. Things as little as the silent treatment from your shift partner, with holding information to do you job properly, are all things that are considered bullying. Things that you would never think as bullying or harassment.
Yesterday something happened at school. P came home and wanted to leave the bus stop as quick as he could, he was asked by B to go to his house and he did not want any part of it. He also had a lot of "melt downs" over anything and everything. In daycare this is how P would show something happened in his day that upset him. By the end of the night we could usually get him to talk. From what my mom got from him was that his French teacher had a talk with both children to figure out what was going on. P did not say anymore but was very upset by his day.
I know the mom of B will likely read this and will be upset but I needed to get this out and off my chest. This is hurting me to watch my son in such pain over this. He enjoyed his friendships until whatever has been happening at school. I also feel that since the two boys can not work this out at the moment and yes my son might be stubborn and stuck on things have happened it is still something that is effecting him. I also feel going to the bus or playgroup that the mothers there are giving me the cold shoulder for this. I may be wrong. I am hoping I am wrong but this is how I am feeling at the moment.
~*Disclaimer: This is not a sponsored post. All opinions are honest and my own. Bullying is a serious matter and it should never happen to a child. Lets take a stand and fight bullying.*~
Oh boy. That is about the toughest thing to deal with once your kids are school aged. You can't tell another parent what to do with their kid but when it effects yours you wish they would just have some common sense and be a real parent or if not find out why their kid is acting in such a harsh way.
ReplyDeleteWe had our share of bullies since K started school. It is a serious issue and we need to teach them NOW that it is WRONG before we end up with more situations like that college student who committed suicide because his peers publically bullied and humiliated him. HE was silent and our childrent should not be. WE are their voice and this post is a start. Good job. BTW heres a post I wrote too on BULLYING
http://www.amotherhoodexperience.com/2010/01/bullies_07.html